The weather has been pretty wild here the past few days. Incredibly rainy... well further north it's been crazy, it just got really windy and rainy here yesterday. A huge barge got stuck on a sand bar and has basically been pushed up onto some public beach in Newcastle; worries of the waves breaking it apart overnight were all over the news reports last night. Roads have been washed out in flooding, and people are missing from cars being swept down rivers where roads once travelled.
Weather is daunting. But I like it. Not to disregard the people and families who have been aversely affected by such weather, I give them all of my love. There's still some kind of guilty pleasure and fascination I have with inclimate weather. Is inclimate a word? Should I look it up on a dictionary site? Am I being overly lazy right now because I don't feel like doing so?
The sublime power it has. The feeling of smallness it can make one feel. The vastness of the universe it reminds you of. Walking to uni today I was reminded of those scenes - walking to uni Ryan? I thought you were done with classes? OH BUT I AM! However I still have two papers to write and two exams to take... which is why I'm not doing them right now (?).
Walking to uni today, amistd the litter of leaves and branches, unmoving from the howling wind because they're so saturated with rainwater, I saw unbrellas tossed lifelessly in gutters, bushes, trees, in the middle of the sidewalk, and on doorsteps. They were opened, closed, half way mangled, upside down, rightside up, and even entirely destroyed. Like fallen soldiers from the previous night's battle, I envisioned the umbrella's owners trying to do nothing more than get home, only to flip out at the last umbrella inverting gust of wind that spays that innocent individual in the face with a cold blast of air and sheet of water.
I'm finding myself wondering if I made the analogy of fallen soldiers because I watched a war movie last night. I also find myself (I think) not enjoying the war movies quite so much because my cousin is overseas playing bang bang right now (I think), as are family members of so many other people. Interesting point for me to ponder.
The umbrella warriors throw down their umbrella in disgust and desperate frustration at the weakness and lack of courage their thankless umbrella has shown. Reminiscent of those scenes in Forest Gump and Bruce Almighty, as Leutenant Dan sits atop the boat lookout being swalled by the treacherous seas challenging God; and Bruce screams defiantly into the sky, "Smite me you almighty smiter!" Or whatever it was he said... Tossing their spent comrades to the side, the umbrella warriors scream psychotically into the stormy evening air, soaked to the bone, and continue onto their fateful journey home towards warmth and comfort - If they are infact as blessed as you or I to have some place to shelter themselves for the night.
Jazz festival tomorrow. Hot dog, can't wait!
Friday, June 8, 2007
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Living in the present
So this past weekend - scratch that, this past Saturday I spent somewhere around the vicinity of 100 bucks... mostly on booze and a complete lack of foresight, but boy was it a good day. My roomates and I started off the day heading to a wine / food festival over in Manly, which is funny because of how much the city's name parallels my character traits... BUT, moving on, they had these sweet little wine glass holders that you buttoned around the glass and then wore around your neck so you wouldn't have to hold it. Getting that was the highlight of my day. We ran into some friends, grabbed a bottle of wine from the bottle shop and listened to the band that was playing into the cool fall breeze coming off of the Pacific Ocean. The sun went down, the music died down, the temperature cooled, the wine warmed our bellies, and the hot dancing brazilian women made me think, "Wow, I really like hot dancing brazilian women".
The wine we walked around tasting was like $200 a bottle and up. We were tempted to get a box of goon (that's basically Franzia), but decided to remain tactful and drank our $14 bottle of wine wrapped ever so candidly in a brown paper bag. The music was great. We headed down to the city after that and started walking approximately 500 miles to and fro at various clubs, where I began the senseless spending spree on all that is beery in this world. Have I mentioned how much better the beer is here than back home? It is. I hope my old flame Coors Light doesn't get resentful when I return. We ended the night heading to Pancakes 24/7 (a.k.a. Heaven on Earth) where I wisely decided to go wander aimlessly by myself to the bar we passed along the way instead of waiting in line. It was some spanish bar that I clearly didn't belong at for two reasons: One, everyone was salsa dancing. And two, EVERYONE, in the entire bar, was salsa dancing - it was about 3 in the morning by now.
Nothing one more beer can't take care of (if you're a complete fool). On the bright side some Australian girl started *trying* to dance with me as she grabbed my hand spinning herself around. I wasn't sure if it was my mad dancing skills or her general inability to stand up straight that prompted her to order us two Jack and Cokes... on my tab. What the hell is she thinking. I don't drink that shit. I want a beer. Ohhhhh good, the bartender just opened up an 11 dollar bottle of some German crap. So after the Aussie girl was done complaining about me paying $25 instead of the full $30 for the drinks I never wanted in the first place, ON HER BIRTHDAY NONETHELESS, I moseied over to comfortable place on the wall to enjoy my drinks. Bitch bitch bitch... it wasn't her birthday. It was a good time though, took a few mental notes for my next go at salsa dancing (...right...), and then some dude walked by and bumped my drink right as I was having another sip. That damn Jack and Coke chipped my tooth. It was time for me to head home. That German beer was tastey... I think.
Now, the truth of the matter is that I can't afford any evening out on the town like that, for a number of reasons, namely my health. I haven't drank like that in ages, I've really cut back on the amount of drinking I do here, which has been great, but every so often... ah what the hell, right? Found out my parents are actually going to come here, they got their plane tickets that morning and called me on their way out to visit Pat, who apparently is moving to another place, which I wasn't aware of because I haven't heard from anyone in my family in a wee little while, baring that brief conversation with my parents. That vacation will be SWEET. We're going to do the backpacker thing. My mom has even volunteered to give some hostels a try, and Dad, well, that loveable guy is spending money. Haha, all he was saying is, "Your Mom is so excited, and I... I just can't believe we're going." That amuses me. This is quite possibly going to be the coolest vacation with my parents ever, I wish the whole family could come. Hot damn can't wait. I miss Logan. Katie tells me he has learned the word 'no' which, when I think of an afternoon together with him and Sean... well. That could be the funniest experience on the face of the planet. I can't wait to get home and see those guys.
And that brings me to my present point. Some lady gave me the best advice today. Ok not some lady, an old highschool teacher of mine who's a freakin superhero. It's funny. You can hear the same old stuff from so many different people, but then one person just says it in some way that's like... "HEY THAT'S A FRICKEN BRILLIANT IDEA!!" It's nothing new, but it just works. It's like, "What the hell, what has MY problem been?" Cheers to her for that, I wasn't even aware that I needed to hear it, but I did. I've been having a great, wild time here, but these last few weeks I've just been feeling stressed about stupid crap. And I say screw you stress! Live in the present, you can keep an eye on the future, but don't worry so much about the money, classes, friendships, girls, and so on kinda crap. I'm in freakin Australia, and classes are done this week... which means my adventures will begin a new again vewy vewy soon. This class stuff has been gettin to me. Time to crank out some papers. Live in the present. Rock a doodle doo.
Radical.
The wine we walked around tasting was like $200 a bottle and up. We were tempted to get a box of goon (that's basically Franzia), but decided to remain tactful and drank our $14 bottle of wine wrapped ever so candidly in a brown paper bag. The music was great. We headed down to the city after that and started walking approximately 500 miles to and fro at various clubs, where I began the senseless spending spree on all that is beery in this world. Have I mentioned how much better the beer is here than back home? It is. I hope my old flame Coors Light doesn't get resentful when I return. We ended the night heading to Pancakes 24/7 (a.k.a. Heaven on Earth) where I wisely decided to go wander aimlessly by myself to the bar we passed along the way instead of waiting in line. It was some spanish bar that I clearly didn't belong at for two reasons: One, everyone was salsa dancing. And two, EVERYONE, in the entire bar, was salsa dancing - it was about 3 in the morning by now.
Nothing one more beer can't take care of (if you're a complete fool). On the bright side some Australian girl started *trying* to dance with me as she grabbed my hand spinning herself around. I wasn't sure if it was my mad dancing skills or her general inability to stand up straight that prompted her to order us two Jack and Cokes... on my tab. What the hell is she thinking. I don't drink that shit. I want a beer. Ohhhhh good, the bartender just opened up an 11 dollar bottle of some German crap. So after the Aussie girl was done complaining about me paying $25 instead of the full $30 for the drinks I never wanted in the first place, ON HER BIRTHDAY NONETHELESS, I moseied over to comfortable place on the wall to enjoy my drinks. Bitch bitch bitch... it wasn't her birthday. It was a good time though, took a few mental notes for my next go at salsa dancing (...right...), and then some dude walked by and bumped my drink right as I was having another sip. That damn Jack and Coke chipped my tooth. It was time for me to head home. That German beer was tastey... I think.
Now, the truth of the matter is that I can't afford any evening out on the town like that, for a number of reasons, namely my health. I haven't drank like that in ages, I've really cut back on the amount of drinking I do here, which has been great, but every so often... ah what the hell, right? Found out my parents are actually going to come here, they got their plane tickets that morning and called me on their way out to visit Pat, who apparently is moving to another place, which I wasn't aware of because I haven't heard from anyone in my family in a wee little while, baring that brief conversation with my parents. That vacation will be SWEET. We're going to do the backpacker thing. My mom has even volunteered to give some hostels a try, and Dad, well, that loveable guy is spending money. Haha, all he was saying is, "Your Mom is so excited, and I... I just can't believe we're going." That amuses me. This is quite possibly going to be the coolest vacation with my parents ever, I wish the whole family could come. Hot damn can't wait. I miss Logan. Katie tells me he has learned the word 'no' which, when I think of an afternoon together with him and Sean... well. That could be the funniest experience on the face of the planet. I can't wait to get home and see those guys.
And that brings me to my present point. Some lady gave me the best advice today. Ok not some lady, an old highschool teacher of mine who's a freakin superhero. It's funny. You can hear the same old stuff from so many different people, but then one person just says it in some way that's like... "HEY THAT'S A FRICKEN BRILLIANT IDEA!!" It's nothing new, but it just works. It's like, "What the hell, what has MY problem been?" Cheers to her for that, I wasn't even aware that I needed to hear it, but I did. I've been having a great, wild time here, but these last few weeks I've just been feeling stressed about stupid crap. And I say screw you stress! Live in the present, you can keep an eye on the future, but don't worry so much about the money, classes, friendships, girls, and so on kinda crap. I'm in freakin Australia, and classes are done this week... which means my adventures will begin a new again vewy vewy soon. This class stuff has been gettin to me. Time to crank out some papers. Live in the present. Rock a doodle doo.
Radical.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Horses, lifeboats, libraries, and personal growth.
I just got out of a meeting with a Social Psychologist here who has been the most accomodating person I've met here yet. He offered to write me a letter of recomendation and I spoke to him for like 20 minutes. Yay for me.
I just discovered the glories of the library. All too often I've used that place for silly things like class assignments when I could have been saving boat loads of money by checking books out instead of buying them. Not to mention the random books I can pick out that just stir my interest. My latest reads that I can't wait to delve into? The Ecological Self by Freya Matthews, and What Number is God by Sarah Voss. Only draw back is that I can't write all over the pages... or CAN I?
I was going to type about Lifeboat ethics and another one of those ever so engaging personal growth epiphanies I had the other day, but that's just not gonna happen. What I will tell you is that I have reinvigorated my strong attraction to betting on things like horses and greyhounds. That shit's addicting man. I finally got to the horse track for my first time EVER this past weekend, and while I didn't win anything, I could totally see myself spending a whole day there... making wise investments. Reminded me of the olden days when I drove down to Alabama with Randall O. and we went to the greyhound races... We broke the rear breaks and almost crashed the burban like five times towing a boat back but we made it home safe and sound. WHOOOOO DOGGY! Good times, good times. I wonder if the Burban is still a member of our family. I can't believe they would get rid of it without telling me. I need to write something creative. Cheers and beers!
- The Ryno.
I just discovered the glories of the library. All too often I've used that place for silly things like class assignments when I could have been saving boat loads of money by checking books out instead of buying them. Not to mention the random books I can pick out that just stir my interest. My latest reads that I can't wait to delve into? The Ecological Self by Freya Matthews, and What Number is God by Sarah Voss. Only draw back is that I can't write all over the pages... or CAN I?
I was going to type about Lifeboat ethics and another one of those ever so engaging personal growth epiphanies I had the other day, but that's just not gonna happen. What I will tell you is that I have reinvigorated my strong attraction to betting on things like horses and greyhounds. That shit's addicting man. I finally got to the horse track for my first time EVER this past weekend, and while I didn't win anything, I could totally see myself spending a whole day there... making wise investments. Reminded me of the olden days when I drove down to Alabama with Randall O. and we went to the greyhound races... We broke the rear breaks and almost crashed the burban like five times towing a boat back but we made it home safe and sound. WHOOOOO DOGGY! Good times, good times. I wonder if the Burban is still a member of our family. I can't believe they would get rid of it without telling me. I need to write something creative. Cheers and beers!
- The Ryno.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Psychology, the Environment, and Spirituality: A potential career pathway...
Taken from a paper by Oliver Straigton. Ecopscychology and spirituality: Essential factors in sustainability? IEST 5004 Environmental Research Project. pg. 3. Via personal email correspondence on 5/22/07
"Spirituality is deemed important for sustainability for [4] main reasons:
1. A re establishment of the psychospiritual connection between humanity and the planet would be an essential feature of any efforts in sustainability. To be [a] successful venture, sustainability requires that it is the overarching theme in ALL aspects of human activity and interaction with the environment meaning that action on all levels of society is motivated by the full understanding that we are part of and not apart from the natural world.
2. At present the rational paradigm in which we live is grossly unsustainable because it is morally and ethically uninformed and many thinkers have argued that one of the essential features in achieving sustainability is a moving away from rationalisation of nature in to commodities and us into consumers, denying the spiritual and mysteries of the universe, cheapening human life and encouraging self definition in consumerist terms.
3. Participation in modern industrialised societies is spiritually unfulfilling and results in over consumption, materialism, and the environmentally destructive effects of these. A spiritually aware society and economy offers the opportunity to seek true fulfilment and happiness thereby negating the need for over consumption.
4. Spiritual renewal and the development of higher human traits of love, compassion, honesty and love are seen as a means to transcend divergent and conventionally unsolvable sustainability problems."
"Spirituality is deemed important for sustainability for [4] main reasons:
1. A re establishment of the psychospiritual connection between humanity and the planet would be an essential feature of any efforts in sustainability. To be [a] successful venture, sustainability requires that it is the overarching theme in ALL aspects of human activity and interaction with the environment meaning that action on all levels of society is motivated by the full understanding that we are part of and not apart from the natural world.
2. At present the rational paradigm in which we live is grossly unsustainable because it is morally and ethically uninformed and many thinkers have argued that one of the essential features in achieving sustainability is a moving away from rationalisation of nature in to commodities and us into consumers, denying the spiritual and mysteries of the universe, cheapening human life and encouraging self definition in consumerist terms.
3. Participation in modern industrialised societies is spiritually unfulfilling and results in over consumption, materialism, and the environmentally destructive effects of these. A spiritually aware society and economy offers the opportunity to seek true fulfilment and happiness thereby negating the need for over consumption.
4. Spiritual renewal and the development of higher human traits of love, compassion, honesty and love are seen as a means to transcend divergent and conventionally unsolvable sustainability problems."
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Yippee Ki Yi YAAAAAAAAAY!
Remember the movie Con Air? It's one of the great American Classics... staring Nicholas Cage. (No really I think that is a glorious movie.) Anyways. I have that song stuck in my head. I know it's a very well known song and I should be aware of who actually is the original artist for it, but I don't. It goes like this (I hope you appreciate my singing voice):
"He's got the whole world, in his hands, he's got the whole wide world, in his hands, he's got the whole world, in his hands, he's got the whole - world - in - his - hands..."
I'm also pretty sure there are way more words then the variety I've shared with you. Way to go on the memory today RYAN! Ok. So it's the part where the little girl is having tea time with the psycho murderer (crimeny what's that actors name?) And they both start singing. Now, I wish the context of the situation wasn't quite so bleak, because after all it is a psycho murderer singing in the middle of a desert with a little girl who is all by herself. But nonetheless, if you can imagine the happy version of that song, that's the one that's stuck in my head.
I just rocked out with a super sweet presentation on environmental ethics, and I just found out I'll be getting to talk with a mentor tomorrow about my goals. Strangely, this week and the past one have been unusually... non - luminous (?) for me. AH! I've been out of the flow, that's what I was looking for. Ebb and Flow Ryno, Ebb and Flow. It's good to be back on the up and up, into the flow of things. Life has so many cycles it can take you through... great stuff.
I dominated the Blue Mountains last week AGAIN. Met some more really great people, went rappelling, had some laughs, did some hikes, developed further plans for my world reign... wrestled with some kangaroos? Cuddled with some Koalas... Honed my superhero skills... ahm, yep I think that covers it.
Sometimes I get in these really... 'interesting' moods where I feel a remarkable amount like Patrick. I don't know how else to describe it... hahaha, that's HILARIOUS. Anyone who knows Pootypablo for who he really is could be slightly concerend right now. They're thinking, "OOOOh boy..."
"He's got the whole world, in his hands, he's got the whole wide world, in his hands, he's got the whole world, in his hands, he's got the whole - world - in - his - hands..."
I'm also pretty sure there are way more words then the variety I've shared with you. Way to go on the memory today RYAN! Ok. So it's the part where the little girl is having tea time with the psycho murderer (crimeny what's that actors name?) And they both start singing. Now, I wish the context of the situation wasn't quite so bleak, because after all it is a psycho murderer singing in the middle of a desert with a little girl who is all by herself. But nonetheless, if you can imagine the happy version of that song, that's the one that's stuck in my head.
I just rocked out with a super sweet presentation on environmental ethics, and I just found out I'll be getting to talk with a mentor tomorrow about my goals. Strangely, this week and the past one have been unusually... non - luminous (?) for me. AH! I've been out of the flow, that's what I was looking for. Ebb and Flow Ryno, Ebb and Flow. It's good to be back on the up and up, into the flow of things. Life has so many cycles it can take you through... great stuff.
I dominated the Blue Mountains last week AGAIN. Met some more really great people, went rappelling, had some laughs, did some hikes, developed further plans for my world reign... wrestled with some kangaroos? Cuddled with some Koalas... Honed my superhero skills... ahm, yep I think that covers it.
Sometimes I get in these really... 'interesting' moods where I feel a remarkable amount like Patrick. I don't know how else to describe it... hahaha, that's HILARIOUS. Anyone who knows Pootypablo for who he really is could be slightly concerend right now. They're thinking, "OOOOh boy..."
Thursday, May 10, 2007
IIIII am writing a lot of papers right now....
"People think that their thinking is what helps them. Thinking is like any other tool. The right amount of it at the right time is useful, but too much is destructive and polluting" - David Cameron Gikandi
"Become aware of your self-talk and stop it. Look around. See the world as it is, without commentary and judgement. Don't think. Wait. At the right time your spirit will give you the appropriate thought." - D.C. Gikandi
I've been working pretty hard lately. Working hard but playing hard. Ok, working too hard - thinking too much. Is it possible to try too hard... hmm no I don't believe so, good hard work is a vibrant tool to life. But we can try to control too much. We can be inpatient. We can become too focused and too immersed in a particular challenge or life issue. We can stress it and ourselves to such a point that we choke off any flow of life, of creative brilliance, of joy.
But I'm learning. I'm starting to feel a welcome shift in my psyche that when I'm enjoying my 'work' (for instance right now) its the best work I can be doing (oh WHAT a revelation). Yes, for me it is quite a revelation; it's one thing to say you understand that previous sentence and to actually personify it's intended meaning and feeling. Quite a departure from my old self who had somehow gotten the idea (as I realize in retrospect) that 'real work' can't be enjoyable... so wrong.
That meditation class I started, I'm only two classes in and already I'm not feeling quite so 'jackass-ish'. Crazy awesome feelings after I'm done with it; that class along with advise from books, mentors, and other intuitive messages I've gotten from my surroundings have all been saying the same thing: Relax and chill the freak out (Remember Rule Number 6?). I'm a laid back guy, but I've gotten into this mindframe where I feel like I always need to be doing something. That's changing and it feels pretty dern good.
I FINALLY GOT A PHONE AGAIN. I enjoyed not having one because it allowed me to get lost in my own little world for pretty much a solid month... I'm actually not too sure what to think about my missing a phone so much... hmm. Whatever. I can call people now. Yippee.
People here are great. Classes here are awesome. It's taken a bit but I'm finally getting to know some Aussies through group work and what not. It's been really surprising to me how many Americans are here. Cool though.
Hmm. I'm going to the Blue Mountains again this weekend with a bunch of study abroad people... really pumped because I haven't been outside of the city since spring break. I'd really like to get out a bit more, so I'm gonna have to see how this whole cash flow thing works out. There are officially 3 more weeks of classes left. That is simply shocking. I don't intend to countdown, I'm not a countdown type of guy, never have, and I thought I never would, but GEEEZE I'm just having a hard time getting a grip on that idea of leaving. I'm still here though. That's three weeks I get to rock out with friends here, and about a month or so more that I get to really be crazy on my own. I'm one blessed dude.
Yep. I'm feeling pretty linguistically enabled right now. Kidding. No more shitty computer technology crap for me. It's time to go outside to play.
Ten - four, over and out.
Oh yeah. My Environmental Philosophy class - ROCKS MY FRIGGEN WORLD. Good talk people.
"Become aware of your self-talk and stop it. Look around. See the world as it is, without commentary and judgement. Don't think. Wait. At the right time your spirit will give you the appropriate thought." - D.C. Gikandi
I've been working pretty hard lately. Working hard but playing hard. Ok, working too hard - thinking too much. Is it possible to try too hard... hmm no I don't believe so, good hard work is a vibrant tool to life. But we can try to control too much. We can be inpatient. We can become too focused and too immersed in a particular challenge or life issue. We can stress it and ourselves to such a point that we choke off any flow of life, of creative brilliance, of joy.
But I'm learning. I'm starting to feel a welcome shift in my psyche that when I'm enjoying my 'work' (for instance right now) its the best work I can be doing (oh WHAT a revelation). Yes, for me it is quite a revelation; it's one thing to say you understand that previous sentence and to actually personify it's intended meaning and feeling. Quite a departure from my old self who had somehow gotten the idea (as I realize in retrospect) that 'real work' can't be enjoyable... so wrong.
That meditation class I started, I'm only two classes in and already I'm not feeling quite so 'jackass-ish'. Crazy awesome feelings after I'm done with it; that class along with advise from books, mentors, and other intuitive messages I've gotten from my surroundings have all been saying the same thing: Relax and chill the freak out (Remember Rule Number 6?). I'm a laid back guy, but I've gotten into this mindframe where I feel like I always need to be doing something. That's changing and it feels pretty dern good.
I FINALLY GOT A PHONE AGAIN. I enjoyed not having one because it allowed me to get lost in my own little world for pretty much a solid month... I'm actually not too sure what to think about my missing a phone so much... hmm. Whatever. I can call people now. Yippee.
People here are great. Classes here are awesome. It's taken a bit but I'm finally getting to know some Aussies through group work and what not. It's been really surprising to me how many Americans are here. Cool though.
Hmm. I'm going to the Blue Mountains again this weekend with a bunch of study abroad people... really pumped because I haven't been outside of the city since spring break. I'd really like to get out a bit more, so I'm gonna have to see how this whole cash flow thing works out. There are officially 3 more weeks of classes left. That is simply shocking. I don't intend to countdown, I'm not a countdown type of guy, never have, and I thought I never would, but GEEEZE I'm just having a hard time getting a grip on that idea of leaving. I'm still here though. That's three weeks I get to rock out with friends here, and about a month or so more that I get to really be crazy on my own. I'm one blessed dude.
Yep. I'm feeling pretty linguistically enabled right now. Kidding. No more shitty computer technology crap for me. It's time to go outside to play.
Ten - four, over and out.
Oh yeah. My Environmental Philosophy class - ROCKS MY FRIGGEN WORLD. Good talk people.
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
Today my professor was talking about aluminum windows. He called them eah-loo-min-ee-um windows on several occasions, with an emphasis on 'min'. My mind. It's filled with all sorts of wacky information. I tried buying a simple little paper back book the other day and it would have costed me like 32 bucks. I found a slightly used one on Amazon for like A buck. No shipping to Aussie land though. Ammm. I started a meditation class yesterday. We were doing all these weird movements and all that I could think to myself was that I was in Australia - the other side of the world - and here I am - making a jackass out of myself - trying to 'learn' how to meditate - by flailing my arms and legs about - next to three hot little babies (and some old ladies, middle aged dudes, and one gypsy, but who's paying attention to that anyways). What the crimeny Ryno, what the crimeny. So long story short, I enjoyed the class and am looking forward to the next one. Radical? In my own special way I do believe so.
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